Step one and a half

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Can I depend on anyone? Can I trust  you with my true feelings? I  have ben making up who I am and what I feel for so long for the sake of others. Can you handle me when I show you the truth? If you see the break down inside of me how scared will you really get?


I can go to a meeting now and put it all on table. Look at it! Look at it! It's grotesque. I can write a book and answer your questions but who will walk with me? Will I always feel deeply alone? Just a monetary smile during the work hours for you to see. I  play some great roles, Mom and Teacher are currently the best I have to offer.  But when the night falls and the walls come down will anyone ever really be there with  me?


What if I could depend on me and trust myself without feeling alone? Would I have to give anything up? Is it possible to give myself the priority that I long for? Is it possible to fill the void on my own?


I have been trying to fill the void with people for so long, what will life be like on the other side of healing?


Stay focused and create new habits.
Allow people in without expectations.
Put others first without strings.
Surround myself with positive people and let go of all that is toxic.
Don't compromise myself or my boundaries.
I can't keep  it unless I give it away - An abundant life is one that flows.

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